Jokes and Messages - 21

Joke :

Doctor Mr X was checking a patient.He put stethoscope in the back and asked the patient to cough. He then put it in the lower back and asked to cough gently. He checked both sides of the chest and Stomuch asking the patient to cough gently. 

When he started to write the prescription the patient asked "What disease I have Doctor? ".Mr X told "You have cough"

Message :

Doctors must be patient

Mr X went to a new release Hollywood movie produced by MGM. The MGM lion roared on the screen immediately Mr X got up saying "This is an old movie.I have seen already. 

Message :

All new will be old one day

Joke :

Mr X ordered pizza. The pizza guy asked how many pieces to cut 4 or 8. Mr X replied "4. I could never eat 8 pieces"

Message :

No piece of mind

Jokes and Messages - 20

Joke :

Mr X went to a doctor with a bump on the forehead and told the doctor as reason for the bump " I am a construction worker.I used to break stones with the hammer. Today my boss saw me and told me to use my head once in a while"

Message :

Outside of the head can't do the work of inside of the head.

Joke :

Mr X was working in Tipu sultan museum. A visitor showed a big skull amd askef whose

skull it was.Mr X replied "Tipu sultan".The visitor showed a small skull next to the big skull and asked the same question. Mr X replied "Tipu sultan's skull when he was 10 years old"

Message :

Man can't see what history doesn't show

Joke :Mr X was a doctor once.He was checking a patient in the eyes, then nose and finally the mouth with a torch light.He then took a paper amd scribbled "The torch is working"

Message :No light can make a man bright.

Jokes and Messages - 19

Joke :

A guy asked the parachute jumping instructor "How long it will take for me to reach the ground if my parachute doesn't open up?"

The instructor replied "The rest of your life"

Message :

In life we do activities and the activities should have life

Joke :

Teacher : Why do we see lightning first and then hear the thunder? 

A student: We have the eyes in the front and ears in the back

Message :

lightning precedes thunder,sight precedes sound even in dictionary.

Joke :

3 priests discussed about how much they keep in the temple collection. One said "I take 20% and leave the rest to God".Second priest said "I take 40% and leave the rest to God".Last one said "I put the day's collection in a bag and throw upward saying 'God take your share and send back my share. So far God hasn't taken his share"

Message :

God gives and forgives.Man gets and forgets

Jokes and Messages - 18

Joke :

They had just introduced 'life' education in U.S.A mother of a second grade girl was waiting for her to return home. The mother was tensed about what they would teach on the new subject. Evening her daughter returned home and told "Mom today Miss taught me about how to make babies".Mom panicked to hear what would follow next. The girl continued "Remove the 'y' and add ' ies' !"

Message :

Tension is a much wasted human emotion

Joke :

It had snowed all over the city. One man comes late to office and reason as "I started walking from my home to office. For every step forward I went two steps backward. ".Boss "Then how did you come to office? "."I got vexed and turned walked fast to go home! "

Message :

All is well that ends well

Joke :

Few guys were waiting outside the maternity ward. A nurse came out and said "who works for double deer, you have got twins". A guy walked in with a smile. Few minutes the nurse asked "who works for Brooke bond 3 roses, you have a triplet.".A guy walked in smiling. Suddenly a guy started walking out saying "let me go.I work for 7up".

Message :

Numbers count.

Joke :

Two guys were going in a train.one had a fax machine and the other was with a small boy.They introduced each other. 

"I am a sales rep for a fax machine company. This is my demo system"

"I am a sales rep for a birth control pills company. This boy is a customer complaint"

Message :

Customer is God